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On A Wing And A Prayer
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Bring your own. That's my advice to anyone searching for a decent cup of joe on
this godforsaken rock.
Pack a Bodum and your own selection of ground beans, because you haven't a prayer
of finding anything other than ditchwater in this town.
Oh, and while you're at it, don't forget to bring your own selection of cream, if
that's how you take your coffee, because all you'll get here is Carnation milk in little tins. Kitschy, but
not very tasty.
As a last resort, Tim Horton's abound, there's one on every major street, but we
know the deal with that. Tim Horton's is only the lesser of many, many evils.
Be prepared for people to stare at you in astonishment and derision if you ask for
anything fancy like an espresso, and for the utter scorn of the other patrons if you disparage the wait
staff for the total undrinkability of the swill they serve up as coffee.
Am I bitter? Hell, yes. But I'll be home next week, space monkeys.
Toodleoo.
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